Professor Marie Time is an amazing diver and a very good archaeologist, but in her spare time there is nothing she likes better that getting together with her friends to share a good joke or two. If you have a joke or a funny fact about the sea, click on the link in the end of the page to send it to Marie!

Q: What do you call a fish without an eye?
A: Fsh!

Q: There was a diver sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?
A:Divers don't lay eggs!

Q:How did the bubble gum cross the road?
A: On the bottom of the Archaeologist's foot!

Q:If Professor Archie O'Logy was away for three days. He left on Tuesday and came back on Tuesday. How is that possible?
A: His boat was named Tuesday!

Q:Does Marie Time use a knife and forks when she eats?
A:No, she uses her fish fingers!

Q:What did the sea say to Marie Time?
A:Nothing, it just waved!

Q:Why was Marie Time embarrassed?
A:Because she saw the big ship's bottom!

Q:What do you call a big fish who makes you an offer you can't refuse ?
A:The Codfather !

Q:What happened to the shark who swallowed a bunch of keys ?
A:He got lockjaw !

Q:What do you get from a bad-tempered shark ?
A:As far away as possible !

Q:What lives in the ocean, is grouchy and hates neighbours ?
A:A hermit crab !

Q:What kind of noise annoys an oyster ?
A:A noisy noise annoys an oyster ! (Try saying that fast!)

From Rebecca in Kent, 10 years old
Q:Why did the fish laugh?
A:Because the sea weed

From Steve in Southampton, 12 years old
Q:What lies on the sea bed and shivers?
A:A nervous wreck.

Funny Facts!

Boldnour Cliff is an important prehistoric site that is now underwater. The site was found by a lobster who when clearing out his burrow pushed out old stone age tools!

Aroound 8,000 years ago Britain became an island, Before that you could have walked over to France for your holiday instead of using the Euro Tunnel, catching a ferry or flying!

When artefacts get buried under the mud and sand at the bottom of the sea, they survive much better then on land. This is because bugs that eat wood and leather can not breather when they are buried as there is no oxygen.

Send us your favourite joke!